God is Bigger than the air I breathe...

The joy of the Holy Spirit is totally contagious.  I went to a worship service tonight with 75 people who just got back from a mission trip to Mexico.  Nine people got baptized and tons more made life changing commitments.  I wish more people would see the correlation between all the serving they do on mission trips and the joy they experience in their relationships with God and others.  What if we really lived everyday like a mission trip?  What if everyday we made time to read the bible and sing a few songs and put our desires aside to serve others?  I truly believe that the "spiritual high" of a mission trip doesn't have to be a fleeting thing.  Sure we go through times when we don't hear God as clearly as we'd like to, and we get tired and cranky, but if we would take the time to remember that God is still right there, interacting with us in every part of our lives, and take time to serve regularly we could find a solid spiritual ground to plant our feet on as we are guided by Jesus.  

I got a good old kick in the pants from God tonight.  As we were singing "Rich or Poor, God I want You more than anything that glitters in this world... 'cause we have all we need in you, all we need is you..."  I was reminded of my tendency to never be satisfied.  When I lived in Springfield I was praying for a place to just get away and have a moment of peace by myself, now that all I have is moments of peace by myself I pray for friends to fill up my time with.  Wether I'm rich or poor in what I think I need, what I'm really wanting is God and I would find all that I need in him if I chose to seek him rather than all the glittering stuff of this world.

 

The End

   As my spring break comes to an end I am reminded once again of how following God's plan for my life will always turn out best.  As I was planning my spring break adventures a friend asked if I thought God would really "call me" to go visit family rather than go on a mission trip.  At the time I was hesitant to answer, but after prayerfully making the decision to go visit my cousins and then reflecting on the week, I can say that yes, God would direct me to not accept an opportunity to serve on a mission trip.  Over the past 4 years I've spent every break I had at camps, on mission trips, or doing internships and I missed out on a lot of family reunions and holiday celebrations.  But, by continuing to seek God's direction for my life he worked it out for me to be able to go have a blast in Minneapolis with my aunt and uncle and 2 cousins for a week.  He also arranged for me to be able to attend 2 great churches and get some amazing spiritual renewal that I definitely needed, and the 18 hours of driving also worked out to be a perfect setting for listening to the entire Financial Peace University series...now if I only had an income to work with...

   God always works out everything for our good, even when I can't see why he's leading me in a certain direction I want to follow his guidance.  

Minneapolis Day 1

I could totally move to Minneapolis and love it!  Especially if I lived close to my aunt and uncle who live right across the road from the Mississippi river that has a trail running alongside the road for miles.  All the runners and bikers I keep seeing are super encouraging and making me want to go out and train!  

    I got to go to a really cool church this morning.  It was a Lutheran church complete with baby baptisms and  kids doin confirmation sermon notes but I met with God there, and man was it good.  After just one visit I new the church's vision, could hear the leader's dreams for the future, new about good sunday school classes and small groups to join, and felt welcomed and accepted in a totally unfamiliar atmosphere.  I'm pretty sure this church "gets it."  The worship was really authentic and God focused.  I don't think I remember ever being in a service where we prayed so much, but it was awesome, and we had 2 separate times to just listen to God individually which I really needed. The whole service was a really great reminder that God isn't trapped or defined by our denominational barriers, He is God and his Spirit is always the same.

    After church we (my aunt and uncle and 2 cousins and I) went to the Mall of America and rode tons of rides in Nickelodeon Universe (formerly camp snoopy).  They had this one fabulous roller coaster called Rock Bottom Plunge where you literally went straight up then went over a little bump and went straight down!  

  Tomorrow looks like a day full of striping wallpaper, should be fun, especially with my 3 year old cousin helpin.  He's pretty adorable!

Rain Drops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens...

These are a few of my favorite things:

 1. Friends that I can count on to keep me awake during long drives 

2. Conversations with friends who really "get me" 

3. Long dark drives on clear nights.  Especially when I have a ton on my heart that I've got to lay out before Christ.  Sometimes I have so much I want to say to God and I just sit there and nothing comes out.  Tonight was a bit different, I didn't even make it the 2 minutes from the house to the gas station before I was crying.  I was frustrated, scared, clueless, longing, thankful, and excited all at the same time and for about 2 hours that all manifested itself in some songs and prayers that were coming from deep within me tonight.  It was the best honest and open connection I've had with God in a long time.  Honestly:

-I really wish I knew what was next 

-I really wish I was part of a passionate church

-I really wish I could hear God more clearly

-I really wish I had 4 more hours in a day

I'm wokring on laying down what I can't do anything about and taking step to improve what I can.  God has been so good to me for the past 22 years, I know He won't fail me now.  

Its 12:18 a.m. on Monday, March 16th, 2009.  This marks the beginning of a week of 3 mid-terms, 2 quizzes, and a research paper.  It's going to be hardcore and awesome. With the strength of Jesus Christ I will kick some college booty this week (roughly paraphrased Phil 4:13). 

Starving

"You're the ocean deep, I'm in up to my knees wanting desperately to drown" -Can't live without you by Bebo Normon

God definitely knows how to get my attention.  I think its cool how he understands each one of us so deeply that he knows the little things he can "tweek" in our lives to really make a point.  Yesterday, God brought out a physical manifestation of the state of my soul for me.  It was not pretty.  I eat every three hours and normally I'm not even hungry between meals. But for the past couple days and especially yesterday I've been really hungry.  Yesterday was really bad, like I'd eat and an hour later feel like my stomach was eating itself.  So I text my friend who knows a lot about dieting/food stuff and his suggestion is to eat more protein, sounds easy enough. 

   Later that night I'm at a campus worship service in Springfield and as I'm hearing Alan preach I get this longing in my soul and just start thinking "I'm so starving!" Only this time its not my body, its my spirit.  And then there was this gentle "you're right!"  I've been living off of shallow Bible readings in the mornings and mandatory chapel services and church involvement but the energy from that "milk" quickly gets used up and I'm left on empty.  I need more protein, I need to start living in maturity and take the initiative to feed myself meat!  Next week I'm going to figure out what church I'm committing to and I'm going to get involved because I want to grow, not because I have to for school, and, I'm going to start doing real Bible study, digging in deep and wrestling with the word, not just getting a nice little thought for the day.   God's the ocean deep, I've been in up to my knees, I am wanting desperately to drown!

Relevant, Music, Servants

  Relevant magazine is fabulous.  They get what it takes to be successful in ministry: "...being realistic about the seasons God takes us through and saying that what used to work isn't good enough anymore.  It's difficult to turn from things you spent years, even decades, pursuing, but when you stop relying on yourself and rely on God alone, things change.  Take risks.  Pursue your passions. Don't be afraid of failure.  Obey God with confidence.  That's where true life, creativity, and calling reside." - Well said Cameron Strang.  We can't keep doing the same thing and expect different results.

  Cameron also mentioned the current Christian music scene...  "We're starting  to see [less revenue leading to a higher emphasis on creativity] right now in the music industry, where new models are emerging in independent music.  Its all happening because the old label-centric industry failed to stay up with shifts in technology and audience tastes, and the bottom fell out..."  That made a lot of since to me when I first read it because lately I 've been really getting tired of "Christian music" which is totally unlike me...  I've been checking out some music online and have discovered a couple bands that I really like a lot, The Glorious Unseen, Joel Auge, Parachute Band, and Seabird are pretty great.

  I've been reading Jesus Centered Youth Ministry and Growing True Disciples for class and they've got me thinking a lot about church and leadership and how others see Jesus in me.  I've kind of been questioning my call lately, but God kicked me back in line this morning.  As I was journaling about Judges 4 (where Deborah is leading the whole nation of Isreal!) and blending that passage in with what I've been learning from other books it finally clicked.  God is calling me to follow him like Jesus (the ultimate leader) did.  I am supposed to serve.  If along the way serving God and serving others happens to mean leading some Bible studies and planning activities then that's cool, bring it on.  It doesn't matter if I'm a chick, we can all serve God.  And its not about me anyway, its about Jesus being lifted up and through that students coming to have a real relationship with Him that will change their lives and the lives of their friends.